This is some scary stuff!

Truth be told, I've been scared my whole life. 

Scared with school, career, choices, getting married, becoming a father, etc. You name it; almost every experience in life has come with a certain amount of fear.  Fear of failing, losing, getting fired; break ups, screwing up the kids, etc. The list goes on. To say that you are not guilty of any of this is a lie. We are all scared shitless about something.  Fear comes with life.  I can't count the number of times I've thrown up before doing things or skipped meals and lost sleep over my nerves.

In time, certain experiences or events become less scary. Either through repetition or growth, you eventually weaken their hold over you or you manage to grow beyond most of your fears.

Yet, fear is always there. It never completely goes away and that's good.

My niece stayed with us for a few weeks this summer. I really enjoy having her visit!  I love her like she's my own and when I look into her eyes; I see a lot of my brother.  It hurts, but the joy of getting a glimpse of my brother is worth the pain.

If you have ever been to a theme park or attraction, then chances are you have ridden something or have avoided riding something that scares the heck out of you. As we climbed the stairs towards the top of this very high ride, you could see the tears well up in her eyes.  She was scared. Clinging to the handrail as she took each step, there were moments when I considered letting her off the hook.  I thought about taking her to do something else, while my wife and kids finished the climb to the top of the ride, but that would have been a terrible idea. You need to challenge the things that scare you. Even fun things.

At the height of her fear, I said "Phoebe, I will guarantee you that this will be your favorite ride of the day". Less than 4 minutes later, at the end of the ride, her teary eyes were gone and replaced with the biggest smile you have ever seen.

She didn't want to ride it, but now she's glad she did.

I'm not necessarily telling you anything you don't already know. We all know that fear needs to be challenged in order for you to grow.  What I am saying is it's pretty important to be scared and if you are not scaring yourself on a regular basis, you're not growing. It's so easy to take the coward’s way out and not take on new experiences or do things differently. You have to keep a certain amount of butterflies in your stomach.  Your palms need to be clammy.  Your blood pressure needs to be raised and raised often.

I hate making myself do things I don't want to do. Even though I often write about change and I often ask people to push themselves, I don't like change just as much as you don't like change. Like most of you, I would be perfectly content just grinding out my day with no surprises or roller coasters. Give me the same 9-5 workday where all I do is rubber stamp things!  But you can't live like that. It's not healthy.  That mundane and cyclical life will eventually kill you. It will make you lazy, stagnant and lame. At some point you will snap and go crazy.

Bully yourself.

Force yourself into scary situations. Put yourself in what you perceive to be a "harmful" situation. This doesn't mean you have to jump out of an airplane or wrestle a bear, but you need to challenge the unknown.  Discover and challenge fear in everyday life. Apply energy towards tackling simple, yet scary, things. Send that email. Finally ask her out. Raise your hand when they ask "does anyone have any questions or comments" during a meeting.  Again, I'm not telling you anything you don't already know, but sometimes you just need to be reminded or bullied into taking the first step.

Do it or I'll pull your underwear over your head.